A Russian communist leader says....

Thursday, March 16, 2006

A Russian communist leader says there is a conspiracy and that the
U.S. is behind the bird flu outbreak. In case you’re wondering, the
Russian leader’s name is Oliver Stone. The democrats are confident
they will in this November’s election. Apparently they’ve studied
the republicans and they’ve learned how to cheat! Experts say that
America’s reaction to the port security deal has really hurt our
image in the Muslim world. Before we were infidels and now were
stupid infidels. Japan is looking for ways to help deal with it’s
rapidly aging population. America has offered to help by sending
them Anna Nicole Smith. The Catholic Church is pushing for a ban on
gay adoption. And that makes sense because priests aren’t supposed
to have children. Movie theatre owners want to jam cell phone
reception to stop cell phone calls during movies. Of course they
wouldn’t have to worry about that if they only sell tickets to people
who have Sprint! At his trial, Saddam Hussein said he was still the
President of Iraq. So you know what that means, the votes from
Florida must be in. Jessica Simpson is going to attend a Republican
dinner. Let’s hope they are not serving something Dick Cheney shot.
Jessica will be sitting next to the House leader. Of course knowing
Jessica, she probably thinks that’s the butler. Mexico has found a
new deep water oil discovery. Actually it must be a tremendous
amount of oil because President Bush is now saying Mexico has weapons
of mass destruction. Michael Jackson was given 24 hours to pay his
staff on his closed Neverland Ranch. Michael had a huge staff that
included 3 chefs, 4 housekeepers and 200 babysitters. George Clooney
is donating his Oscar gift basket to charity. The proceeds will go
to benefit the 40 million victims of Clooney’s acceptance speech.

posted by The Laugh Factory at 12:36 PM